Back in uni

I noticed I haven’t moved an inch to share my life with others since I came back to uni. I am paralyzed by the fear of having to come back to reality. Yet on the other hand, I find myself willing to take up any challenges for the harvest. Am I actually ready to take it all up? *sigh* Perhaps that shouldn’t be the ultimate question after all. The is no point asking that question because the bottom line is that I will never ever be ready enough! Bah.

I could see all my close friends here ‘toiling’ through their life in turmoil. Practically everything agitates them, from friends to the university’s system. I cannot deny that the uni has a part to play for the ‘sufferings’ all of us had to undergo. The system is as usual a screw up. They just like to carry out experiments on us, taking us like guinea pigs. The main problem is the hostel placements. The worst thing that happened is the exchange of dorms; the guys got the girls’ previous dorm vice-versa. It is a totally stupid thing to do.

The guys’ previous hostel, which is now the girls’ is SO dirty, you couldn’t believe your eyes. I mean, aren’t those fellas civilized? The mattress that they used to sleep on is black in colour, has a disgusting smell of urine or some urea based chemical, and has holes on it ( looks like is was rat-bitten or just some VERY itchy fingers’ job) ! Well, that was my first mattress. I really couldn’t sleep on it! I cannot help but wonder if those guys actually suffer form any skin disease or not with the level of hygiene that they practice. Ergh…eeky.

Thank God that I have really special families in Kuantan to help me by providing sleeping bags. Otherwise, Yeoh and I would have to sleep on the floor for a night! I really thank the Lord for His providence. The students’ affair department just provided us with some proper mattress today, and I feel totally blessed. It was worth a night’s wait because we got much cleaner mattresses!

I am not sure how those first year students are coping with this kind of lifestyle here, in this uni. Blame the boo-boos on the management of the uni. Gah.

Sadly, the introvert me is on the loose. I haven’t spoken to any of the 1st year students (not that I met any of them personally either), and this isn’t very nice. It would be great to mix around and get to know the others slightly better. Placing this issue aside, I have much to settle within my group of friends.

There were unresolved matters within my group since day one of uni (last year). It’s the same case; can’t stand a certain friend’s attitude. The worst thing is that now, the mandate of ‘educating’ that friend some manners and helping to get her attitude right in the society is given to me! What can I do to help that friend? All of them are my friends here (my course mates). Those who can’t stand that particular friend’s attitude came to me and said that I am the only one who can get along with her well enough and I am the only one who can stand her. Thus, it makes me the best person to talk to her and advise her. *sigh*

I suppose, if I look on the brighter side, on the side that Jesus would have probably looked at, I can take this as an opportunity to shine and share my life with my friends. The most effective way of sharing is by showing and living it out. Ah well, this was what I learnt from today’s QT. I really hope to be the best for my Lord.